Nakala

Do you know that the Bible describes a good type of grief—grieving in a godly manner? We cannot avoid grief in life. Even Jesus wept at the tomb of Lazarus. And He wept as He rode into Jerusalem, knowing that His nation would reject Him.

How can we identify grieving in a godly manner? What is godly grief?

First, godly grief is when we grieve over our burdens without becoming bound to our past. Some people grieve over what they have lost and never move forward. The question you need to answer is this: What are you focusing on today—your memories of the past, or your dreams for the future? Godly grief is when we grieve over our burdens without becoming bound to our past.

Second, godly grief is when we grieve over our pain without forgetting God’s perspective.

What did God teach you in the past in that valley where He gave you new insight into His Word? What is God teaching you today about Himself?

Beloved, God never intends suffering to be wasted. There is always fresh vision and godly perspective down there in the valley of suffering. That is why Isaiah called that valley, the “valley of vision” (Isaiah 22:1, 5).

Now as we sail back into 2 Corinthians 7, Paul talks about different kinds of suffering that he endured here in verses 5-6:

When we came into Macedonia, our bodies had no rest, but we were afflicted at every turn—fighting without and fear within. But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus.

Why was Paul afflicted, and how did Titus’s arrival bring him comfort?

It is no secret that the Corinthian church was a problem church for Paul. He was distressed by the divisions among them (1 Corinthians 1:10-13). He was frustrated by their immaturity (3:1-4). He was ashamed of their pride (4:6-8). He had to rebuke them for tolerating sexual immorality in their midst (5:1). He even had to scold them for the selfish way they were observing the Lord’s Supper (11:17-22).

How would you like to pastor a church like that? It was one heartache after another. And it completely wore out the apostle Paul. He had not been able to sleep; he found no rest and was afflicted at every turn.

That is why the arrival of Titus brought such encouragement. Paul had sent Titus to Corinth to check up on them. And in those days of slow travel, it was weeks before Titus returned with a report. But when Titus finally returned, he had great news: the Corinthians had taken Paul’s words to heart and were making great progress in correcting the problems.

This brought Paul great joy—but it also encouraged Titus. Paul writes in verse 7, “and not only by his coming but also by the comfort with which he was comforted by you.”

Look at the effect this had on the apostle Paul. He writes that his anguish and affliction were worth it: “I am filled with comfort. In all our affliction, I am overflowing with joy” (verse 4).

This is a good reminder, beloved, that when you walk with God, you not only encourage yourself, but you encourage others as well. I can summarize in two sentences what Paul is communicating here: God’s comfort and strength are always greater than our suffering and pain. No matter what kind of grief you are going through, God has a good purpose behind it all.

This report from Titus thrilled Paul, who writes to the Corinthians, “He told us of your longing, your mourning, your zeal for me, so that I rejoiced still more” (verse 7). Paul doesn’t seem surprised that this church was in mourning, so to speak. He continues in verse 8: 

For even if I made you grieve with my letter, I do not regret it—though I did regret it, for I see that that letter grieved you, though only for a while.

In other words, he had expected his letter to bring them grief. He was sorry it had to be that way, but he was not sorry about writing the letter itself. They needed to hear what he had to say.

Their grieving was for their benefit. Paul writes in verse 9, “I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting.”

When the Corinthians read Paul’s letter of rebuke and correction, they responded in exactly the way God wants us to respond when He corrects us. They realized the truth of God’s Word made them uncomfortable, but instead of making excuses, they faced up to the pain they had caused by their actions. They repented and started making things right. As Paul writes in verse 9, “You were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief.”

Paul now spends some time talking about the differences between godly grief and worldly grief. In verse 10 he says, “Godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.”

You and I might have never thought there were different kinds of griefs. The truth is, the difference might mean life or death—eternal life or eternal judgment.

Worldly grief is me-centered. Godly grief is God-centered.

Worldly grief comes from our own sinful nature, and it leads us to make excuses and complain that we are being unfairly accused. Godly grief is produced by God’s Spirit, and it leads us to repent of our sin.

Worldly grief says, “How could this happen to me?” Godly grief says, “How could I let down my Lord this way?”

In worldly grief, we are concerned about our own reputation. In godly grief, we are concerned about how we have hurt God’s reputation.

Worldly grief makes a person bitter. Godly grief makes a person better.

Paul adds this in verse 11:

See what earnestness this godly grief has produced in you, but also what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what punishment! At every point you have proved yourselves innocent in the matter.

When Paul says that the Corinthians proved themselves innocent, he is not saying they tried to prove he was wrong about them, that they were innocent of all the things he rebuked them for. Instead, Paul is saying they made things right and became innocent. They repented. And they proved their newfound innocence by their newfound zeal for God.

Toward the end of chapter 7, Paul talks about his joy at Titus’s good news and about Titus’s joy and how he was refreshed by his visit with the Corinthians. Then in verse 14, Paul writes something that might surprise us:

For whatever boasts I made to [Titus] about you, I was not put to shame. But just as everything we said to you was true, so also our boasting before Titus has proved true.

Paul had actually boasted about the Corinthian church to Titus. He had spoken highly to Titus of this “problem church.”

Paul always saw the good that God could bring about in people’s lives. Even though Paul suffered greatly because of this church, he was evidently an incredible optimist, always looking forward to the future, always seeing the potential in every believer and in every church.

And that is a good reminder for us: No matter what problems you see around you today, concentrate on the goodness of God—the good things God is doing; the good things God has given you. Yes, you might be grieving today, but make sure it is godly grief.

Godly grief is when we grieve over our burdens without becoming bound to our past. Godly grief is when we grieve over our pain without forgetting God’s perspective.

So, what is God teaching you today in the valley of fresh insight—in that valley of new vision?